Not too long ago, success was marked by quiet milestones—buying a home, sending children to school, or building a business. Today, even those moments are often incomplete unless they are documented and validated online. Likes, comments, and reposts have become the new applause, and many people now chase them with the same intensity previous generations reserved for tangible achievements. The catch is that this applause doesn’t come cheap—it is often financed through designer bags, luxury holidays, flashy cars, and extravagant dinners, even when the bank account tells a different story.
Social media has transformed lifestyle into performance art. In the same way actors need applause, many of us now need engagement to confirm that our lives are “on track.” That validation, however, isn’t free. It comes wrapped in designer bags, vacation photos, luxury cars, or extravagant dinners. A Lagos-based banker, who preferred not to be named, put it bluntly: “I know people who take loans just to celebrate birthdays at the most expensive lounges. They need the videos for Instagram—because if no one saw it, did it even happen?” This pursuit of applause can often blur the line between aspiration and recklessness. Overdrafts and digital loans are becoming the invisible sponsors of curated lifestyles.
Nigeria’s vibrant party culture, especially weddings, has also collided with Instagram in an interesting way. Outfits aren’t just stitched for the dance floor anymore—they are stitched for the explore page. The pressure to show up in head-to-toe luxury has fueled what some tailors and makeup artists describe as an “asoebi economy.” One fashion stylist in Abuja said, “Clients will come in with Pinterest images of celebrities, knowing they can’t afford the look, but they’ll insist. Many put outfits on credit because they want that one viral photo. It’s not about the party, it’s about the post.”
From “outside life” hashtags to “chop life before life chops you,” flex culture has found a home online. What used to be rare indulgences are now weekly rituals. For some, it’s Friday nights at high-end clubs, for others, it’s spontaneous trips to Paris. Financial institutions have noticed. Digital lenders now advertise aggressively, subtly tying financial products to lifestyle. “Don’t let money stop your weekend fun,” reads one campaign from a popular fintech app. While access to quick credit can be empowering, it also feeds into impulsive spending habits. According to a 2023 report by SBM Intelligence, over 40% of young Nigerians admitted to borrowing money to keep up appearances, particularly for social events or social media moments. This isn’t unique to Nigeria; in the U.S., surveys show millennials spend an average of $500 a month on “non-essential” purchases influenced by social media.
Psychologists point to the dopamine rush associated with likes and comments. Dr. Femi, a behavioral psychologist, explains: “Social validation taps into the same pleasure centers as gambling or drugs. When you receive likes on a luxury post, your brain rewards you. Over time, some people begin to crave that validation and justify any expense that can get them there.” This explains why someone might forgo saving for rent just to buy an iPhone or luxury sneaker—because the online payoff feels immediate, while the consequences are delayed.
There are countless viral stories of people who push too far. One young man in Accra allegedly rented a car and staged a “soft life” photoshoot that went viral—until the rental company repossessed the car mid-party. Another case in South Africa saw a university student under investigation after using scholarship funds to bankroll a lavish lifestyle showcased on Instagram. These stories don’t just highlight poor judgment; they expose how the desire for validation can spiral into financial fraud.
Celebrities are, of course, complicit—though not entirely to blame. When an Afrobeats star posts a luxury private jet selfie, they are feeding into a culture that equates visibility with wealth. The difference is, celebrities often have the resources to sustain these lifestyles—or at least the brand endorsements to fund them. The problem arises when everyday individuals try to mirror that same standard without the backing. As one social commentator quipped: “The influencer economy has tricked regular people into thinking they need a PR budget just to exist.”
Not everyone agrees that social media is the culprit. Some argue it’s merely a mirror reflecting existing desires. Before Instagram, people still borrowed money for big weddings or flashy cars. The difference now is the audience size. A party used to impress 200 people in a hall; today, it can impress 20,000 online. In fact, some influencers are flipping the script. Pages dedicated to “living within your means” or “budget luxury” are gaining traction. They show followers how to thrift stylishly, travel smartly, and enjoy life without breaking the bank.
The bigger question is how individuals and society adapt. Financial literacy is becoming a critical tool. Some fintech startups are already integrating “financial health scores” and savings nudges into their apps. Meanwhile, a few influencers are openly posting about debt, savings goals, and the less glamorous parts of adulting. This shift may seem small, but it matters. It signals that audiences can reward authenticity just as much as they reward extravagance.
At its core, financial recklessness driven by social media validation is about identity. We are trying to prove—to friends, strangers, and sometimes to ourselves—that we are successful, worthy, and living well. The danger lies in outsourcing self-worth to an algorithm. As author Alain de Botton once wrote, “Wealth is not about having a lot of money; it’s about having a lot of options.” Yet, in the pursuit of likes, many are losing those very options, trapped by debt and insecurity. Social media isn’t disappearing, and neither is the desire to be admired. But perhaps the new form of luxury is balance—the ability to enjoy life without bankrupting the future. After all, the loudest flex might just be financial stability.
